When Twitter became a thing, I didn’t have it and purposefully joined it later to avoid clashing with others and getting into Tweet wars. I was on my newly-found spiritual path and didn’t want anything to disrupt that.

So when I would hear of the latest person being bullied over past behavior, I didn’t take much interest in it because it all seemed so silly.

Fast forward to almost ten years later and I am deeply concerned at how this has set the precedent for how we treat one another. Whether you have social media or not, it is clear to tell that there is tension in the air. Now, more than ever, it seems like the culture of tearing down others is popular; however, forgiveness, understanding and compromise is at an all-time low.

I am hoping for a turn around of this and am always hopeful. It is definitely a great time to be alive and mostly because it is a time to practice compassion, understanding and what is right, more than ever before.

Here are 3 things that I have learned about cancel culture:

1. We can’t go back and rewrite the past.

I was watching The Joe Rogan podcast featuring Kanye West and he said that bringing up someone else’s wrongdoings from the past, hurts you more than anyone else. I’m totally paraphrasing but that was the gist of it.

It sounds easy to be forgiving and understanding and, most of us probably think that we would do it without any issue. Until the day comes when we find out someone we know or hold to high-esteem has a shady past or has done something wrong in their life.

Welcome to being a human-being, none of us are perfect. We can’t go back and force someone to change what they have done because the past is over. Whether it’s an offensive tweet, an act of unfaithfulness or even merely a mistake, we have all done things that we are not proud of.

2. God has the final say.

I have always been very spiritual and connection to Source/ The Divine/ God is so important to me. That relationship has molded me and shaped me into who I am.

I have been vocal about a time in my life when I was lost and was barely getting by, I was in a toxic relationship and drinking a lot. I asked God for a sign and received many. I was offered Grace, compassion, love and understanding by the Almighty. And, I am forever grateful.

God’s love says to me, I am here for you when you need me. Once you accept what you have done and correct it as much as you can, I will never hold it against you again. Imagine if we treated one another like this?

I am a firm-believer in boundaries and accepting when a situation or person might not be healthy for you and needing to release yourself from them. However, holding them hostage for the rest of their lives is not our job. God has forgiven so why haven’t we?

3. There are too many fingers pointing in the wrong direction.

Until we can look in the mirror and be completely happy with everything we have said, done or a way we behaved, we have no right to judge others. There is a difference between protection/ boundaries and judgment.

We have gotten to a point in society where we are happy to tell our side of a story but struggle to listen to another’s. We are happy to make mistakes but condemn another for making one. We will cancel or boycott someone for not saying the right thing without explaining to them what they have done or taking that as an opportunity for us to see their side of the story.

This is my pet peeve and I have been guilty of it, too. It was only until close friends and family did it to me that I saw how detrimental it can be to assume the worst of people without hearing what they have to say. My recent personal healing has been to release the need to convict someone else or make them into a bad person when it is not my job to label people.

What someone has done is between them and God. I can merely try to understand them, protect myself or move on with my life. But, the need to vilify anyone is something I will try to avoid in my present and future.