I was telling a friend of my past relationship horror stories and remembered the kind of people that I used to keep in my life. Although they were a mixed bag of people, there was a general energy amongst most of them that they could use me, verbally or emotionally abuse me and, I would be okay with it.

As I have grown, that is clearly no longer the case but it took a lot to get here. All the work was worth it because I can clearly say that I have no problem defending myself and speaking up for what I believe in with convictions. All while still trying to maintain a healthy and balanced life of joy.

I’ve learned to not to take what someone else does to me, no matter what it is, personally. Because taking it as such is the first set up to taking on baggage on drama that is not mine to own.

While I have learned a lot. Some of this journey has involved me releasing a lot and sometimes reluctantly. However, I had to and now that I have, I am grateful that I was nudged by The Divine to do so.

Here are 9 things that I had to release to vibrate higher and attract people who are doing the same:

1. The need to make excuses for myself and others.

2. The need to seek revenge on others.

3. Victimhood thinking.

4. My former hate for men.

5. My former reluctance to genuinely be happy for others.

6. The need to people-please and fit in.

7. The idea that I must say yes to a favor I am asked even if I don’t want to do it.

8. To receive male attention by seeking it in degrading ways.

9. That I must expect others to do more for me that I can do for myself.