There is nothing more attractive and inviting than someone who takes responsibility for their own actions. Until I understood this concept, I feel like I was only halfway living my life.

The truth is that no matter what we have been through, we must take responsibility for ourselves. Until we do, we will not reap the full blessings of victory. This ideal is the opposite of victimhood because instead of feeling sorry for ourselves, we can own up to things from a mature place.

With that, comes growth but it also naturally releases certain things from sticking around in our lives. I may not necessarily believe that we attract who we are; however, we most certainly attract lessons that take us to our ultimate selves. When we are victims, we will be thrown circumstances and people that we need to learn from in order to mature and grow.

Here are 3 Things I have stopped attracting since I released my victimhood:

1. People with unkind intentions.
Naïvely, I used to think that everyone meant well for me as I do for others. I would love to see everyone do well and thrive as long as they are being true to themselves.

Today, I see and understand that not everyone does and they don’t have to. However, energy is contagious and I would rather surround myself with people who we can vibe well off of one another’s energies.

I am done dealing with people are not truthful, have ulterior motives or who are just plain negative. I choose to be around those who come with a kind heart and show this in their actions.

2. Relationships with abusive people.

I have been very vocal about this. So those of you who keep up with my posts know about the fact that I have had many relationships where I was emotionally, verbally and (sometimes) physically abused. I could sit here and say that it was their fault but I do take responsibility for my actions.

The root cause of my need to have these people in my life is that I was raised by someone who was abusive towards me and my subconscious tried to deny it until I had to face it, head on. When I did, healing from my childhood could take place and I stopped blaming others for healing that I had to do.

It is very liberating to know that you can overcome any obstacle and thing that might’ve been designed to stop you and continue to thrive in-spite of them. Particularly unhealthy relationships.

3. Fake friends.

It has taken me up until recently to shed myself of any fake friends. Not acquaintances but friends. Those people who only befriend you because they might need something or because they need to have attention around them.

I will admit that I was a fake friend to many, especially when I carried a sense of victimhood because I needed people around me who would condone my behavior and support my negativity.

We spoke about one another and betrayed each other. And after our interactions, I would feel empty and sometimes even worse.

Since releasing my victimhood and taking ownership for my life, I have less friends but they are the kind of friends that support me and I to them. We genuinely love each other and know that we can agree to disagree. We come from a place of truth, not falsity.