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It’s funny how we think we’re in a relationship with the one until, all of a sudden, we aren’t. I am guilty of believing that the relationship I am in is ‘the one’ because I am a romantic and I believe in love having a chance.
I recently ended a romantic relationship and although it was difficult to do, I feel that it was best. When I was younger, I would end relationships and distance myself from people if they had hurt me. Which, now, is not always the case.
Sometimes, two people can be wonderful but have the wrong timing or different plans for the future. As I grow older, I realize that love is not enough to make a relationship sustain through difficulty. So, now when I go through a break-up, I am no longer angry about it.
Here are 4 reasons why I won’t be angry about my recent break-up:
1. He is a great guy.
If I could pick a perfect partner, it would be him. He is kind, loving, mature, compassionate and full of wisdom. I know in my heart that he will make someone happy but that someone doesn’t have to be me. Life experience has taught me that just because someone is great, doesn’t mean that that someone is great for you.
It’s a difficult concept to grasp because we want to hold onto things that benefit us and surround ourselves with good people. However, two good people that are independent do not always equal a good couple.
2. Anger can be misplaced.
During our break-up, I noticed myself misplacing my anger. I started to feel angry about how other men had treated me and started placing it on me. My past is not his issue and, if he has not done anything for me to be angry at him for, then he does not deserve my anger.
3. We have great memories.
I could spend my days looking at the past and counting what he did wrong but that wouldn’t be fair to either of us because we have so many great memories together. I am choosing to remember the great memories because we have many more great memories than hurtful ones. The great memories remind me of why I chose to enter the relationship and I will choose to enter another in the future.
4. I would do it all again if I could.
Even though it has ended, I would do it all again. I would open myself up to him again, talk on the phone everyday, hold his hand again, laugh with him again, hold him again and send him love notes again. Because with love, there is always a chance that it will end. Just because it will end, doesn’t mean that we stop loving and become bitter, it means that we give our all knowing how grateful we are to have something that not everyone has.