I used to be very insecure and being confident in my own skin has not come easily. In fact, it has been one of the most challenging that I have to embrace because, in general, we are not raised to be at peace with ourselves. It is a societal condition to look at what someone has, looks or has done as better than yours. This thinking is toxic. My insecurity was so bad that it became unbearable to see other women succeed when I was insecure because I felt like if they did well; I wasn’t able to succeed too.

I understand now that when someone else does well, it is a chance for me to celebrate them and me. It has taken me years and practice. And, I wish that I could credit it to one specific thing; however, it has been an holistic approach to wanting to be love and embody love. I have seen how jealousy, insecurity and envy has created destruction in my life and others- each day I choose to embrace confidence and inner confidence so that I can be at peace.

Yes, I have come a long way. Here are 9 affirmations that I remember when another woman does well:

1. Sometimes winning is being happy for someone else.

2. There is enough for everyone.

3. If she can do it, so can I. Vice versa.

4. Being together in peace is better than being separated by insecurity and hate.

5. I won’t always be at the top and number 1. I am not meant to be.

6. I want to compete for fun; not for self-destruction and misery.

7. Recognizing someone else’s power helps me see my own.

8. There is power in praising someone else’s work and what they have achieved.

9. It feels good to be happy for myself and for others. We are all connected.