I have hope that I will find true love and respect- 2/23/2020

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I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

He is emotionally and physically available to be in a relationship with me. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

He is upfront and honest with his feelings about me. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

I will not need to feel like a martyr and as though I am giving more than I receive. Our love is reciprocal. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

A bond where commitment and union takes precedent over anything else. 

I have hope that I will true love and respect. 

A partnership that I won’t have to guess how my partner feels, we assure one another. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

We choose each other daily without secrets and embrace honesty. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

He has used his past as a way to transform and enlighten himself and those around him. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. 

He embraces me and lets me know when he is going through something that is challenging him because I can’t read minds and shouldn’t have to. 

I have hope that I will find true love and respect. We embrace one another with honesty, trust and commitment

Now that there is you, B.

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Now that there is you, 

I understand why I had to learn what I have learnt to have compassion and appreciation for you. 

You are a blessing that I would never want to change, alter or make into something or someone else. 

You have so much love and energy. I feel grateful to be in your presence and in your space. 

Your kindness, love and generosity influences me to want to embody these characteristics more. 

We’ve come a long way and I hope we have more to go because we are deeply connected. 

Now that there is you, 

I don’t need to pretend to be okay, pretend to have found the perfect one, act like I am happy when so much is missing. Because this is real and abundant with what I have always wanted.

Dear B,

Dear B, 

In case you haven’t noticed, I am a fighter, a hustler and an over- achiever. Sometimes I forget; however, that this mentality can work against me and the people in my life. It has harmed what we have and I am sorry. 

You see, I manifested you and me together. So, when you showed up, it seemed too good to be true so I was trying to figure out what the catch was. I had my guard up because my past has been filled with genuine seeming people who were actually in it for all the wrong reasons. I have been in romantic situations for the wrong reasons beforehand. 

So, I have had to look at myself and that mirror never goes away. In fact, sometimes it is hard to see that the person who is standing in your way is you, ‘The Self-Saboteur’. My self-sabotage convinced me to believe other people about you, only to realize that these people are not worth believing in. You are worthy of my belief because you have shown me your kindness, love and compassion from the beginning. 

Here I am, B, I let down my guard and open up my heart. No more running, ghosting and pulling tricks that I felt I had to do before because this feels different. This is not the cycle that I was in, in my previous relationships. 

I apologize for all the obstacles and the hoops. I am learning more and more that I don’t have to put up challenges in order for me to feel safe around people that I love. I need to trust my intuition about who I have chosen to be in my life. And, sometimes the wrong way is the right way. I choose you, B, even if it’s the wrong way because it feels a hundred percent right to me now. 

All my love, 

H