Dear Insecure Girl...

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Dear insecure girl,

You don’t have to put up with being placed as second, third, fourth or fifth. You deserve to be number 1.

You don’t have to believe that you are not worthy of what you want, you are enough!

You don’t have to allow bad behaviour in your life for fear of being alone. You are your own best friend. People come and go but you will always remain. So, stand true in your morality and truth because only you can live with the consequences of your actions.

You don’t have to treat yourself with disrespect. Only you can treat yourself exactly the way that you want to be treated. It’s not be selfish, it’s being self-full so that you have enough to give to others.

You don’t have to spend your time worrying about what others think. There will always be someone who thinks negatively of you. It’s not your business to worry about what you can’t control, focus on what you can control.

You don’t have to spend your time on the negative. Focus on love, progress and being successful.

You don’t have to believe in their mediocrity. Mediocre people will want you on their level at all costs, don’t give in. You are more than mediocre. You are great

The most popular article of The Year: 4 Types of people that you need to distance yourself from.

Thank you for writing us about your favourite article this year, here it is again. Just for you! Happy New Year and best of luck for 2019  

If you asked me a few years ago if I knew how to set boundaries for myself, I would  have replied, ‘Boundaries? What boundaries?’

TRUTHFULLY, I WASN’T THE GREATEST AT SETTING BOUNDARIES BUT NOW I FIND THEM NECESSARY. WHAT IS ALSO NECESSARY IS DISTANCING YOURSELF FROM TOXIC PEOPLE.

This article is inspired by a meme that I saw on Instagram that quotes Dwayne Johnson on the type of people that we should distance ourselves from:

1. People who lie to you.

Like we were told when we were young kids, ‘A liar is a thief and a thief is a liar’. This may sound a bit exaggerated, however, you can’t trust people who lie to you. To avoid conflict and issues in your life, distance yourself from people who lie to you because you won’t be able to trust them. And, what good is a relationship that doesn’t have trust?

2. People who disrespect you.

Like my mother always used to tell me, ‘Every doormat says welcome’. That saying has stayed with me everyday of my life. When we allow people to disrespect us, we are responsible too. To protect yourself from disrespectful behaviour, distance yourself from disrespectful people because only you can stand up for yourself.

3. People who use you.

We all have people in our lives who like to push our buttons, harass us for money or feel entitled to our time. Well, it’s time for you to distance yourself from them. It is not always your problem when people find themselves in a bind. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t help but don’t become someone’s crutch, you deserve better than that.

4. People who put you down.

Unfortunately insecure, mean and unfriendly people exist. But that doesn’t mean that you have to be friends with them. You deserve to be surrounded by people who support, appreciate and acknowledge you; not people who put you down. If you hang around people who call you names, disrespect you or treat you badly, you will soon do the same to yourself.

The 4 biggest lessons that I am learning as I approach my 30th birthday.

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In almost a month, I will be 30 and although I am proud of my life. I never imagined how that my life would turn out this way. My life has taken different turns, swivels, stops and halts . Along the journey, these are the 4 biggest and most important things that I have learnt:

1. I am the only who can validate myself.

I won’t lie, I love being in my twenties and I will miss it. However, my early twenties were difficult and challenging because I sought after validation from people and things. It took me trying to prove to other people that no matter how much I tried to prove myself, it wasn’t enough. The reason for this is because people have their lives to live. They are going about their day constantly looking through the lens of their own eyes, in search of what they need and want from life. So, how can I expect them to give to me what they might not be capable of knowing themselves? I’ve learnt and am still learning that other people may be able to compliment me; however, validation has to always come from myself. If it doesn’t, I will spend my life seeking other people’s approval and miss out on the empowerment and confidence that I can give to myself; something that no one else can give to me.

2. My life is exactly how it is meant to be.

I recently had a tough time accepting this. To cut a long story short, I was told that I would meet my soulmate by two different psychics (who randomly came into my life to tell me this). I was told and guessed that it was a well-known person who would frequent a yoga studio that I used to teach at; but came to realize that it wasn’t meant to be. My phases of mourning have included anger, upset, crying, fear, passion, stubbornness, judgment and rage because I didn’t get my fairytale. I learnt many lessons, one of them that my life is exactly how it is meant to be and living it, being present and aware of my surroundings is more important than chasing a dream or person that never was.

3. With or without someone or something beside me, I am enough.

This is an extension of what I learnt from the last paragraph. Another lesson that I learnt is that, with or without something or someone beside me, I am enough. When I was told that I would end up with this person, I started thinking about how magical my life could become. I selfishly thought about what I would get from the relationship: who I would meet and how it would help my career being with someone with him- this lasted a few days until one day, I stopped myself. I looked in the mirror and asked myself why I found it necessary to have these extra things when I am enough, right here/right now. No materials, no spouse and nothing in-between my eyes but me. I am and always will be enough, regardless of what is beside me. No materials or person can replace self-worth.

4. Love doesn’t mean force, it means support.

Love is a journey that is always evolving. This year, I fell in love with a man and we can not be together. In the beginning, it was hard to accept it but now I understand that love doesn’t necessarily mean that I have to be with him; it means that regardless of what he chosen for his life, I support him. I was afraid to admit that I loved him because if I did, I had to get his love back in return. What I know for sure is that love doesn’t always come back to us. If we receive love back from someone, great. But if we don’t, we don’t have to create suffering and pain because it didn’t go our way. Life is always working in our favour and one day, I will understand why it didn’t work out exactly how I had wanted it to. Until that day comes, I will trust God and send him love.

4 choses que j'aurais aimé savoir au lycée

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Le lycée a été une phase délicate pour moi. J'ai eu des moments où je me suis senti à l'aise; Cependant, la plupart du temps, je me sentais comme si je n’étais pas digne d’être.

J’ai fréquenté deux prestigieuses écoles de filles à Johannesburg, en Afrique du Sud. Ce qui était finalement une telle bénédiction pour mon avenir, mais il était difficile de voir beaucoup de fois quand j'étais à l'école.

Même si je suis reconnaissant d’avoir fréquenté le lycée, voici certaines choses que je souhaiterais connaître pendant mon séjour:

1. L’école ne vous prépare pas à la vie.

Après avoir obtenu mon diplôme d'études secondaires, je me suis dit que j'étais prêt à affronter The World. Je pensais que j'avais appris tout ce que j'avais besoin de savoir pour pouvoir fréquenter le collège et affronter la vie. Et je n'aurais pas pu être plus éloigné de la vérité. Je me suis retrouvé à New York, ne sachant rien de l'aide financière, des bourses, des crédits ou des prêts d'études. Le lycée est formidable, mais c’est une bulle où les vrais problèmes, comme les problèmes financiers, sont laissés de côté.

2. Être victime d'intimidation, dans une certaine mesure, vous rendra plus fort.

Quand j'ai commencé à mon deuxième lycée en 2006, j'ai été accueilli par la plupart de mes pairs, à l'exception du groupe des filles populaires. Ils étaient l’équivalent de ‘The Plastics’ de Mean Girls. On avait l'impression qu'ils contrôlaient beaucoup de la scène sociale et que leurs actions étaient menées par des esprits mesquins. J'avais l'habitude d'être une fille populaire alors ça m'a donné une autre perspective. Il y a une fille en particulier qui a clairement fait savoir qu'elle ne m'aimait pas et que parfois ça me cassait. Elle roulait des yeux quand je parlais en classe et commentais. Cependant, ma personnalité ne cède pas lorsque les gens sont méchants avec moi; Je ne fais que devenir plus fort. Être victime d'intimidation de la part de ce groupe de personnes au lycée m'a appris que, si je crois en moi-même, ou quelque chose du genre, cette conviction est plus forte que ce que quiconque pense.

3. Le lycée n'est pas tout.

Au lycée, j'avais cette idée fausse que c'était la chose la plus importante dans The World. Onze ans plus tard, c’est l’un des plus gros mensonges que je me suis jamais dit. Quand j'entends des enfants se tuer (à cause d'une brute ou de beaucoup de pression) au lycée, ça me brise le cœur parce que la vie est tellement meilleure après le lycée. Le lycée ne représente que quelques années de votre vie, il ne vaut pas la peine d'être consommé.

4. Le système de hiérarchie ne veut rien dire dans le monde.

Dans la plupart des écoles secondaires (sinon toutes), il existe un système de hiérarchie. Classant généralement de populaire à moins populaire. Cependant, lorsque nous quittons le lycée, nous sommes tous au même niveau. La plupart des collèges et universités se moquent de qui vous étiez au lycée, tout le monde recommence. Je me souviens comment je pensais que le lycée racontait comment je serais représenté quand j'ai commencé le collège. Cependant, c'est complètement faux. Le lycée me semblait limité mais, dans The World, il y a des chances illimitées de se lever et de recommencer, encore et encore.

10 Things That You Can Do To Help Save The Environment.

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The newest Climate Report that was published is frightening. Recent claims state that if we continue to emit Greenhouse gases at this current rate, Global Warming will destroy our Environment by 2040.

So, what are we waiting for? If you say The Government, there are ways for you to make a positive impact on The Environment.

Here are 10 of them:

1. Limit your plastic.

2. Recycle and reuse plastic, over and over!

3. Switch to paperless, whether it’s with billing statements or pay stubs, less paper is better.

4. Buy a shopping bag to reuse.

5. Take more public transport.

6. Switch to electric or a hybrid car.

7. Limit your meat consumption.

8. Buy from sustainable and organic farms.

9. Compost when you can.

10. Don’t litter! 

4 Things That I Wish I’d Known During High School.

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High School was an awkward phase for me. I had moments where I felt comfortable; however, most of the time, I felt like I wasn’t worthy.

I went to two prestigious Girls’ Schools in Johannesburg, South Africa. Which was ultimately such a blessing for my future but it was hard to see a lot of the times while I was in school.

Even though I am grateful for having attended High School, these are some things that I wish I’d known during attendance:

1. School doesn’t prepare you for life.

After I graduated (or matriculated) from High School, I thought that I was ready to take on The World. I thought that I had learnt everything that I needed to know in order to attend College and take on life. And, I couldn’t have been farther from the truth. I found myself in New York City not knowing anything about financial aid, scholarships, credits or student loans. High School is great but it is a bubble where real issues, like financial problems, are left out.

2. Being bullied, to an extent, will make you stronger.

When I started at my second High School in 2006, I was welcomed by most of my peers except for the group of popular girls. They were the equivalent of ‘The Plastics’ from Mean Girls. It felt like they controlled a lot of the social scene and their actions were driven by mean-spirits. I had previously been used to being the popular girl so this gave me another perspective. There was one girl, in particular, who made it clear that she didn’t like me and sometimes it broke me. She would roll her eyes when I would speak in class and make comments. However, my personality doesn’t give in when people are mean to me; I only become stronger. Being bullied by this group of people during High School taught me that if I believe in myself, or something, that belief is stronger than what anyone else thinks.

3. High School is not everything.

In High School, I had this misconception that it was the most important thing in The World. Fast forward to eleven years later, and that is one of the biggest lies that I have ever told myself. When I hear of kids killing themselves (because of a bully or a lot of pressure) during High School, it breaks my heart because life is so much better after High School. High School makes up only a few years of your life, it is not worth being consumed over.

4. The Hierarchy system doesn’t mean anything in The World.

In most (if not all) High Schools, there is a hierarchy system. Usually ranking from popular to the least popular. However, when we leave High School, we are all on the same level. Most colleges and universities don’t care who you were in High School, everyone starts afresh. I remember how I used to think that High School was telling of how I would be represented when I started College. However, this is completely untrue. High School seemed limiting to me but, in The World, there are are limitless chances to get up and start over, again and again.

10 izizathu zokuthi kungani nginqume ukugxila ekukhuthazeni.

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Masibe ngabangempela, sibe nezwe elihle ezweni lapho kuningi ukungabi nalutho okwenzekayo akulula kodwa kuyaphumelela.

Isikhathi sokuqala lo mqondo wafika kimi lapho ngineminyaka engu-9 futhi ngaya emngcwabeni woMkhulu. Amakhulu abantu akhuluma ngomusa wakhe, ukuthethelela okuqhubekayo kanye nokukwazi kwakhe ukubona njalo okuhle. Bathi izwi lakhe eliyintandokazi laliyilo, 'Wonke amafu anensimbi yesiliva'.

Ngibambe ngalokhu. Nakuba ngingakaze ngikwenze njalo, ngibambelele kulo mqondo futhi ngizame ukukusebenzisa ngangokunokwenzeka.

Nazi izizathu ezingu-10 ezenza ngihlale ngikhetha ukugxila kokuhle:

1. Ukungabi nalutho kunzima.

2. Yini esiyigxile ekukhuleni. Ukugxila ekuziphatheleni okuhle kwenza kube lula ukukhula.

3. Ngemva kokuphela kokusebenza, kukhona okumele ufunde kuwo noma ujabulele.

4. Kukhona ukunganaki okwanele kuleli Hla.

5. Yonke into engifuna ukuyibona e-World, iqala nami.

6. I-positivity engiyibekayo ibuyele emuva kimi.

7. Emkhakheni wothando uthando.

8. Inhloso yami ukukhanya, uthando nokuthula.

9. Ukumisa kwenza i-World ibe yindawo enothando kakhulu.

10. Ngoba, ekugcineni, konke kuyisifundo noma isibusiso.

10 Reasons Why I Have Decided To Focus On The Positive.

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Let’s get real, being positive in a World where a lot of negativity is happening is not easy but it is achievable.

The first time this concept came to me was when I was 9 and I attended my Grandfather’s funeral. Hundreds of people spoke of his kindness, continuous forgiveness and his ability to always see the positive. They said that his favourite saying was, ‘Every cloud has a silver-lining’.

I held on to this. Although I may not have always practiced it, I held on to this concept and have tried to implement it as much as I can.

Here are 10 reasons why I always choose to focus on the positive:

1. Negativity is heavy.

2. What we focus on expands. Focusing on positivity allows positivity to expand.

3. After all is done, there is something to learn from it or be grateful for.

4. There is enough negativity in This World.

5. Everything that I want to see in The World, starts with me.

6. The positivity that I put out is coming right back to me.

7. At the core of love is positivity.

8. My aim is to be light, love and peace.

9. Positivity makes The World a more loving place.

10. Because, ultimately, everything is a lesson or a blessing.

Las 3 razones por las que he decidido renunciar al odio hacia un hombre.

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Recientemente, tomé una decisión. Decidí dejar de lado el odio que sentía hacia un DJ / músico / productor que frecuentaba un estudio de yoga en el que daba clases.

Cuando él venía al estudio de yoga, mi odio se mostraba arrogante y se comportaba como si fuera mejor que él, lo cual se ha convertido en mi protección y armadura cuando oculto mis verdaderos sentimientos.

A pesar de que sabía que no era saludable tener estos sentimientos de odio hacia él, lo hice de todos modos porque me sentía cómodo observando su comportamiento y cómo trataba a las mujeres. Verá, anteriormente había sido un fanático de su música y estaba desanimado de que él tuviera una gran plataforma en las redes sociales y en el ojo público y que tuviera imágenes de mujeres casi desnudas y que promocionara la imagen pobre de las mujeres. Que las mujeres solo son buenas para mirar y que tienes que ser sexy para que te vean como una mujer.

Soy feminista por lo que los derechos humanos y la igualdad son importantes para mí, para todos, no solo para las mujeres. Menciono esto porque me pareció (a mí) como el tipo de mensaje que intenta difundir a través de su plataforma que me decepcionó a mí como fan, mi decepción causó dolor y mi dolor condujo a la ira.

Estaba tan lleno de ira que cuando lo veía, escuchaba su música o su nombre, me quemaba por dentro y me sentía extremadamente incómodo. Hasta que un día, estaba saliendo de Trader Joe en Hollywood y vi una enorme cartelera de él. Tuve un trastorno mental Sentí que había hecho todo lo posible para dejar ir a este hombre y la sombra de este hombre me estaba siguiendo. Comencé a llorar porque me di cuenta de que mis pensamientos y sentimientos estaban mejorando de mí y tenía que terminar. Decidí dejar de lado el odio que había desarrollado durante algunos meses.

Y, aquí es por qué:

1. Cuando odiamos algo, se expande.

Nuestros pensamientos son muy poderosos. Así como hay manifestación positiva; También hay manifestación negativa. Que tu atención se expanda. Lo que había estado practicando mentalmente con él era que, si lo odiaba lo suficiente, dejaría mi existencia, pero no es así como funciona. El Universo quiere que seamos mejores personas y quiere que liberemos el odio. Hasta que decidamos hacerlo, se nos enviarán las razones por las que es hora de liberar el odio hasta que un día decidamos hacerlo.

2. El odio solo detiene a la persona que está odiando.

Durante mi fase de odio hacia él, tendría un día maravilloso hasta que su canción saliera en la radio y luego me llenaría de ira. Enojado porque alguien tan talentoso era tan hipócrita porque en sus canciones y entrevistas, él difunde el mensaje de amor e igualdad, pero sus acciones mostraron lo contrario. Miré en su página de Instagram una vez (para juzgarlo) y vi un reloj que decía que era hora de respetar a las mujeres y me puse furioso. Les dije a todos mis amigos que pensaba que era repugnante que alguien que retrata a las mujeres de esa manera pueda decirles a las demás que respeten a las mujeres cuando él claramente no lo hace. Todo esto solo me estaba afectando. Porque cada vez que hablaba mal de él, que lo ignoraba y que criticaba su carácter, viajaba por el mundo, vivía su vida y probablemente no tenía ni idea de que tenía tanta animosidad hacia él. ¿De qué se trata, pues? Cuando odiamos a alguien o algo, es posible que no tengan una idea de nuestros verdaderos sentimientos. Siguen viviendo sus vidas; Mientras estamos atrapados en el pasado y la falta de perdón.

3. El odio solo continúa por cuánto tiempo lo queremos.

Claro, la gente puede decir y hacer cosas que nos lastiman, nos hacen enojar y pueden llevarnos a querer odiarlos. Es una parte de la vida. El Dalai Lama dice: "El verdadero héroe es el que conquista su propia ira y odio", lo que significa que el odio y la ira son parte de nuestras emociones; Sin embargo, solo nos convertimos en mejores personas al elevarnos por encima. Elevándose por encima de las acciones de otra persona, superando los comentarios hirientes y superando los malentendidos Superar sus propias negatividades le permite comprenderse y apreciarse a sí mismo, así como a los demás

The 3 Reasons Why I Have Decided To Give up Hate Towards A Man.

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Recently, I made a decision. I decided to let go of the hate that I had towards a DJ/Musician/Producer who would frequent a yoga studio that I taught at.

When he would come to the yoga studio, my hate showed up in arrogance and behaving like I am better than he is- which has become my protection and armor when I am hiding my true feelings.

Even though I knew it was unhealthy to have these hateful feelings towards him, I did so anyway because I was comfortable looking down on his behaviour and how he treated women. You see, I had previously been a fan of his music and was disheartened that he had a big platform on social media and in the public eye and would have almost-naked pictures of women and would promote the poor portrayal of women. That women are only good to look at and that you have to be sexy to be seen as a woman.

I am a feminist so human rights and equality is important to me, for everyone, not just women. I mention this because it seemed (to me) like the kind of message that he tries to spread through his platform was which disappointing to me as a fan, my disappointment led to hurt and my hurt led to anger.

I was so filled with anger that when I would see him, hear his music or his name, I would burn inside and feel extremely uncomfortable. Until one day, I was walking out of Trader Joe’s in Hollywood and I saw a huge billboard of him. I had a mental freak out. I felt like I had done everything to let go of this man and this man’s shadow was following me. I began crying because I realized that my thoughts and feelings were getting the better of me and it had to end. I decided to let go of the hate that I had developed over a few months.

And, here is why:

1. When we hate something, it expands.

Our thoughts are very powerful. Just like there is positive manifestation; there is negative manifestation too. What you focus on, expands. What I had been mentally practicing with him was that, if I hate him enough, he will leave my existence but that’s not how it works. The Universe wants us to be better people and wants us to release the hate. Until we decide to, we will be sent reasons why it’s time to release the hate until one day, we decide to.

2. Hate only stops the person who is hating.

During my hateful phase towards him, I would be having a wonderful day until his song would come up on the radio and then I would be filled with anger. Anger that someone so talented was such a hypocrite because in his songs and interviews, he spreads the message of love and equality but his actions showed otherwise. I looked on his Instagram page once (to judge him) and saw a clock that said that it was time to respect women and I went ballistic. I told all my friends that I thought it was disgusting that someone who portrays women like that, can tell others to respect women when he clearly doesn’t. All of this was only affecting me. Because every time that I spoke badly of him, that I ignored him and that I criticized his character, he was travelling the world, living his life and probably clueless that I had such animosity towards him. So, what was the point? When we hate someone or something, they might not have a clue about our true feelings. They go on living their lives; while we are stuck in the past and unforgiveness.

3. Hate only goes on for how long we want it to.

Sure, people can say and do things that hurt us, make us angry and can lead to us wanting to hate them. It’s a part of life. The Dalai Lama says, ‘The True Hero is the one who conquers his own anger and hate’, meaning that hate and anger are a part of our emotions; however, we only become better people by rising above. Rising above someone else’s actions, rising above hurtful comments and rising above misunderstandings. Overcoming your own negativities allows you to understand and appreciate yourself, as well as others.

The 4 Best Things That Have NEVER Happened to me!

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I am a firm-believer in everything happening for a reason. That doesn’t mean that you sit around waiting for things to happen to you, it means that all your energy, effort and work can lead you to meet particular people at particular moments or that if you didn’t land that ‘dream job’, it’s because it might not have been so dreamy after all.

Everything is working to support us. Whether you want to live a lifestyle that is healthy, full of love and gratitude; or, want to live a life that lacks health, love and gratitude, The Universe will support your decision. Because what we reap, we sow. Not applying to everything! But, in most scenarios, the seeds that you plant today will begin to grow and manifest in your life.

Looking back on certain things in my life, I am so grateful that everything has turned out the way that it has because life is good. I do believe that things continue to conspire for my good; however, these are the 4 best things that I am glad never worked out:

1. My love life.

The ‘post-breakup’ me would not be happy to admit this but I am glad that every relationship that I have had didn’t work out because I believe that my soulmate is alive, healthy and is open to the idea of a loving and healthy relationship. I am forever an optimist and I believe wholeheartedly that love is real. I believe that every heartbreak I have been through had a purpose. All of my romantic partners have taught me something. Whether it was how to let go, to embrace darkness, to be patient or to genuinely love, all of my former partners helped carve who I am today and I am grateful because when I meet my soulmate, I can share the best things that I have learnt in love with him. All of that couldn’t have happened without them.

2. A baby.

I have been very vocal about having a miscarriage two years ago. Even though it was painful, it was necessary. This is how I see it: she (the baby) came into my life to teach me something and I believe it was how to stand up for myself and those that I loved. Before this happened, I had difficulty being strong and making firm-decisions. However, after I told my partner that I was pregnant and he disappeared, I decided to keep her and fight for love without caring about the consequences. I took a real stand for the first time in my life and, although I lost her, it felt great to stand firm in what is right and follow through. I made a promise to God that no matter what, I would always take a stand and do what was right- no matter what backlash I might face or what I might lose as a result.

3. My ‘dream’ job.

Almost three years ago, I was promoted to General Manager of a restaurant in New York. I had been a manager beforehand and, although it wasn’t my ideal job, it came with the chance to network with influential people and work in an affluent neighbourhood. However, I had three problems: The Owner that I worked for was inexperienced and had a bad temper, my Co-Worker mistreated me and undermined me (as a woman) and the pay fell extremely short. One day, I was in a yoga class and The Yoga Teacher said, ‘If you asked for something that you thought you wanted and you don’t want it anymore, you can always send it back’ and a lightbulb went off in my head. I could send back that job. So, I gave my resignation and decided to teach more yoga and wait on tables for a living. One of the best decisions that I have ever made.

4. Having my dad around my entire childhood.

I am proud today to say that I can see The Divine reason as to why my Father disappeared when I was 15. I spent many years taking his disappearing personally and hating him, only to realize that hating him was ridding me of living a full life that could belong to me if I chose to forgive. After the first time that I almost got married, I knew that I had some serious healing to do and it was more than anything to do with my romantic relationship, I had feelings of resentment towards men that I needed (and still need) to heal. After a therapy session, I wrote my Dad a forgiveness letter and I realized that I was meant to be raised exactly the way that I was. My Dad was well off and him leaving meant that a lot of the money went too. But, truthfully, I am glad that I didn’t grow up with a lot of money. Money is not bad if you are solidified in yourself, which I was not. Not having a lot of money growing up gave me drive and work ethic because I know that it is possible to achiever goals and that, if I want it, it can be mine no matter where I come from or what I look like.

4 autres choses que j'ai apprises sur les ennemis

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Que nous voulions l'admettre ou non, il y aura toujours quelqu'un de haineux dans nos vies. Il peut s'agir d'un ami, d'un membre de la famille, d'un colocataire, d'un partenaire amoureux, d'un partenaire commercial ou même de vous.

Récemment, j'ai appris quelques autres choses sur les ennemis que je voudrais partager avec vous:

1. Blesser des gens blesser des gens

Je me suis récemment rendu ennuyeux envers un musicien / DJ / producteur qui fréquentait un studio de yoga où j'enseignais à Los Angeles. Toute la haine que j'avais accumulée envers les hommes, je l'avais mise sur lui parce que c'était facile. Il était facile de haïr un homme qui n’est publiquement pas le plus gentil avec une femme parce qu’il était la cible la plus grande. Il a une plate-forme et des millions d'adeptes sur Instagram. La partie détestable de moi était jalouse de pouvoir répandre le message de démolir les femmes. Je me suis retrouvé à dire de vilaines choses sur son personnage jusqu'au jour où je me suis rendu compte que je ne le connaissais même pas. Comment puis-je être si détestable envers lui? J'étais tellement dur avec lui et être dur conduit à la haine. La haine est un fardeau que je ne veux pas porter. Alors, je lui ai envoyé une lettre d'excuses et je lui souhaite le meilleur. Je devais regarder en moi pour voir ce qui n’était pas guéri. Il n'est pas responsable de quelque chose que d'autres hommes m'ont fait. Il ne mérite pas d’être le destinataire de la haine.

2. Tout le monde ne va pas vous célébrer.

Dernièrement, j’ai accepté le fait que tout le monde ne sera pas content de mes réalisations, car elles n’ont pas à l'être. Ils ne doivent pas être heureux pour moi. En outre, j’ai appris que les personnes qui n’ont rien à célébrer dans leur vie risquent davantage de ne pas célébrer la vôtre. Les gens ont affaire à eux-mêmes et à leur propre vie et, habituellement, ce qu'ils ressentent pour vous n'a rien à voir avec vous. C'est une extension de ce qu'ils ressentent pour eux-mêmes.

3. Tout le monde ne veut pas le meilleur pour vous.

Dans un monde idéal, tout le monde s’enracine mais ce n’est pas la réalité. Le monde dans lequel nous vivons est plein d'amour et de lumière; Cependant, il y a aussi la haine et les ténèbres. Nous faisons tous un choix quotidien de ce que nous choisirons d'embrasser chaque jour et certaines personnes choisissent les ténèbres et la haine. Avec l'obscurité vient la négativité, être méchant, mensonges et actes répréhensibles. Nous ne pouvons pas nous attendre à ce que tout le monde soit à son meilleur ou s'enracine pour nous, nous ne pouvons qu'espérer le meilleur de nous-mêmes. Comment d'autres personnes choisissent de se comporter, c'est comment elles ont choisi de se comporter. S'ils voient la lumière, génial! Si ce n’est pas le cas, tant mieux! La vie continue.

4. Ce n’est pas personnellement.

Comme je l'ai déjà dit, les gens ont affaire à eux-mêmes et tout le monde ne sait pas comment surmonter l'incompétence, l'ego, la haine de soi, la trahison et la négativité. La plupart des gens vont le lâcher directement sur quelqu'un d'autre après que cela leur soit arrivé. Même certaines des attaques de haine les plus «personnelles» sont une extension de l'endroit où cette personne se trouve mentalement, physiquement et émotionnellement, ne le prenez pas personnellement. Tout le monde est à un endroit différent dans sa vie et certains ne sont pas enclins à être meilleurs. Aimez-les à distance et laissez-les partir. Ils ne sont pas votre problème, sinon vous vous retrouverez face à la négativité, la douleur et la souffrance de quelqu'un d'autre.

4 more things that I learnt about haters

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Whether we would like to admit it or not, there will always be someone hateful in our lives. It might be a friend, a family member, a roommate, a romantic partner, a business partner or even you.

Recently, I learnt a few more things about haters that I would like to share with you:

1. Hurt people hurt people

I found myself recently being a hater towards a Musician/DJ/Producer who would frequent a yoga studio that I used to teach at in Los Angeles. All of the hate that I had accumulated towards men, I had placed on him because it was easy. It was easy to hate a man who publicly isn’t the kindest to woman because he was the biggest target. He has a platform and millions of followers on Instagram. The hateful part of me was jealous that he could spread the message of tearing women down. I found myself saying nasty things about his character until one day, I realized that I didn’t even know him so how can I be so hateful towards him? I was so harsh on him and being harsh leads to hate. Hate is a burden that I don’t want to carry. So, I sent him an apology letter and wish him the best. I needed to look within myself to see what wasn’t healed. He is not responsible for something that other men have done to me. He doesn’t deserve to be the recipient of hate.

2. Not everyone will celebrate you.

Lately, I have come to terms with the fact that not everyone will be happy for my achievements because they don’t have to be. They don’t have to be happy for me. In addition, I have learnt that people who have nothing to celebrate in their own lives are more likely not to celebrate yours. People are dealing with themselves and their own lives, and usually how they feel about you has nothing to do with you. It is an extension of how they feel about themselves.

3. Not everyone wants the best for you.

In an ideal world, everyone is rooting for each other but that is not reality. The world we live in is full of love and light; however, there is hatred and darkness too. All of us make a daily choice of what we will choose to embrace each day and some people choose darkness and hatred. With darkness comes negativity, being mean, lies and wrongdoing. We cannot expect everyone to be at their best or to be rooting for us, we can only expect the best from ourselves. How other people choose to behave is how they have chosen to behave. If they see the light, great! If they don’t, great too! Life goes on.

4. It’s not personally.

Like I said before, people are dealing with themselves and not everyone knows how to overcome incompetence, Ego, self-hatred, betrayal and negativity. Most people will unleash it right onto someone else after it has happened to them. Even some of the most ‘personal’ attacks of hatred are an extension of where that person is at mentally, physically and emotionally, don’t take it personally. Everyone is at a different place in their lives and some are not inclined to be better people. Love them from a distance and let them go, they are not your problem to deal with or you will find yourself taking on someone else’s negativity, hurt and pain.

12 more things that I am grateful for.

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In light of Thanksgiving, here is a list of 12 things that I am grateful for at this moment:

1. A roof over my head.

2. The food that I just ate.

3. My body.

4. The ability to breathe.

5. The ability to think.

6. Freedom of choice.

7. The money in my bank account.

8. The fact that I can see.

9. The fact that I can hear.

10. My family.

11. My friends.

12. Love.

3 cosas que podrían arruinar tu piel.

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Siempre digo eso: 'Detrás de cada persona confiada es una piel suave y saludable', porque lo que sentimos por nuestra piel puede tener un efecto en cómo nos vemos a nosotros mismos y, por lo tanto, en cómo nos ven los demás.

Luché durante años con eczema y rosácea y nada me ayudó durante muchos años. Esto me llevó a investigar un poco y descubrí que el ingrediente principal de la mayoría de los productos para la piel era el agua que seca la piel.

Como resultado de mis hallazgos, volví a la escuela para estudiar piel y me gradué con un diploma en formulación para el cuidado de la piel orgánica.

A lo largo de los años de dirigir una compañía de cuidado de la piel y ayudar a las personas con su piel, he visto lo que puede dañarla.

Compartiré contigo 3 cosas que podrían arruinar tu piel:

1. agua

Cuando pensamos en el agua, pensamos en la hidratación; Sin embargo, no nos estamos refiriendo a la hidratación externa. Externamente, usamos agua para limpiar, no para hidratar. La mayoría de los productos utilizan 70% o más de agua como base para ahorrar dinero. Sin embargo, esto no es ideal para su piel porque cuanta más agua haya en sus productos, más conservantes se necesitarán en sus productos para mantenerlos en el período de validez. Es por eso que la mayoría de las personas actualmente tienen acné porque los productos se están secando la piel y, en lugar de hidratarse, se les colocan sustancias químicas tóxicas.

Remedio: opte por sus productos para la piel a base de agua por aquellos que son ricos en aceites y humedad.

2. Fragancia sintética

Según un estudio publicado por la FDA en 2016, la fragancia es el carcinógeno número 1. No solo no es saludable para los pulmones, sino que si se lo coloca en la piel, puede provocar diferentes trastornos y problemas de la piel. Cuando me refiero a la fragancia, me refiero a las fragancias sintéticas que se utilizan más comúnmente en nuestra vida cotidiana. Aunque existen limitaciones para la fragancia de aceites esenciales, hay menos porque los aceites esenciales están hechos de ingredientes botánicos que son más compatibles con nuestras células de la piel y se derivan de las plantas, por lo que tienen menos efecto sobre el medio ambiente.

Remedio: cambie su antigua fragancia sintética por una fragancia a base de aceite esencial.

3. Estilo de vida

Puede tomar de su piel todo lo que quiera, pero si come de manera poco saludable, bebe mucho café y alcohol, y se siente estresado todo el tiempo, verá que su piel se deteriora. Gaste todo el dinero que desee en el mundo y eso no cambiará nada. La salud es un estilo de vida y generalmente su piel le mostrará que necesita hacer un cambio en su estilo de vida.

Remedio: ser honesto consigo mismo y preguntarse si está durmiendo lo suficiente, comiendo lo suficiente o bebiendo suficiente agua. Luego haga más de lo que necesita para lograr un equilibrio saludable en su vida.

* Patrocinado por KindGirlco. Echa un vistazo a nuestro BUY BIOLOGIQUELIFE para productos KindGirlco

www.kindgirlco.com Para màs

3 things that could be ruining your skin.

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I always say that, ‘Behind every confident person is smooth and healthy skin’, because how we feel about our skin can have an effect on how we see ourselves and thus, how others see us.

I struggled for years with eczema and rosacea and nothing helped me for many years. This led me to do some of my research and I discovered that most skin products main ingredient was water which dries the skin out.

As a result of my findings, I went back to school to study skin and graduated with a diploma in organic skincare formulation.

Over the years of running a skincare company and helping people with their skin, I have seen what can damage the skin.

I will share with you 3 things that could be ruining your skin:

1. Water

When we think of water, we think of hydration; however, we are not referring to external hydration. Externally, we use water to cleanse, not to hydrate. Most products use 70% or more of water as a base to save money. However, this is not ideal for your skin because the more water that is in your products, the more preservatives are needed in your products to keep them at shelf-life. That is why most people currently have acne because products are drying out their skin and instead of hydration, toxic chemicals are being placed on their skin.

Remedy: Opt out your water-based skin products for ones that are rich in oils and moisture.

2. Synthetic Fragrance

According to a study released by The FDA in 2016, fragrance is the number 1 carcinogen. Not only is that unhealthy for your lungs but if placed on your skin, it can lead to different skin disorders and problems. When I refer to fragrance, I am referring to synthetic fragrances which is most commonly used in our everyday life. Although there are limitations to essential oil fragrance, there are less because essential oils are made from botanicals that are more compatible with our skin cells and are derived from plants so they have less of an effect on the environment.

Remedy: Swap out your old synthetic fragrance for an essential oil-based fragrance.

3. Lifestyle

You can take of your skin all you want but if you eat unhealthily, drink a lot of coffee and alcohol, and are stressed out all the time, you will see your skin deteriorate. Spend all the money you want that you want in the world and it will not change a thing. Health is a lifestyle and usually your skin will show you that you need to make a change in your lifestyle.

Remedy: Be honest with yourself and ask yourself if you are getting enough sleep, eating enough greens or drinking enough water. Then do more of what you need to bring a healthy balance to your life.

*Sponsored by KindGirlco. Check out our BUY BIOLOGIQUELIFE for KindGirlco products  

10 raisons pour lesquelles il est important de parler

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Nous avons tous quelque chose qui nous passionne: les droits de l’homme, les droits des animaux, le féminisme, la durabilité, l’amour, etc. La liste s’allonge encore et encore.



Quelle que soit votre passion, je vous encourage à en parler.Je suis moi-même passionné par quelques domaines, en particulier les droits des femmes et le fait que les femmes soient décrites dans des médias aussi puissants et puissants que les hommes, car ces représentations laissent une trace dans notre esprit.



Voici 10 raisons pour lesquelles il est nécessaire de parler de ce en quoi vous croyez:



1. C’est important.

2. Votre voix doit être entendue.

3. Cela pourrait inspirer quelqu'un d'autre.

4. Vous pourriez vous surprendre.

5. Vous pourriez surprendre quelqu'un d'autre.

6. Vous pourriez être exactement ce que quelqu'un a besoin d'entendre.

7. Cela pourrait encourager quelqu'un d'autre.

8. Cela pourrait vous aider à progresser.

9. Cela pourrait vous aider à vous laisser aller.

10. Cela pourrait aider le monde à devenir un meilleur endroit. 

10 reasons why it’s important to speak up.

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We all have something that we’re passionate about, it might be human rights, animal rights, feminism, sustainability, love... the list goes on and on.

Whatever you are passionate about, I encourage you to speak up about it. I, myself, am passionate about a few things, particularly women’s rights and women being portrayed in media as powerful and strong as men are portrayed to be, because portrayals leave an imprint on our minds.

Here are 10 reasons why it is necessary to speak up about what you believe in:

1. It’s important.

2. Your voice needs to be heard.

3. It might inspire someone else.

4. You might surprise yourself.

5. You might surprise someone else.

6. You might be exactly what someone needs to hear.

7. It might encourage someone else.

8. It could help you progress.

9. It could help you let go.

10. It could help the world be a better place.

10 inspirational quotes by Gary Zukav

When I saw Gary Zukav speak on Oprah for the first time, he was featured on a segment called ‘Super Soul Sunday’. This was four years ago and he spoke about a Spiritual Partnership that he shared between him and his partner, Linda. One that two people share that is higher than romantic relationships, beyond games and allows spiritual growth between two people. 

After that, I read his book entitled Spiritual Partnerships and it enlightened me about a relationship that I wanted to attract into my life. One that enriched each other’s souls as opposed to depleted them. In general, Gary has a great way of simplifying what the soul is and how it relates to us in our lives and relationships.

Here are 10 inspiring quotes about Gary Zukav.

1. The amount of stress in your life is determined by how much energy you expend resisting your life.

2. Try to realize, and truly realize, that what stands between you and a different life are matters of responsible choice.

3. Eventually, you will come to understand that love heals everything, and love is all there is.

4. Humbleness, forgiveness, clarity and love are the dynamics of freedom. They are the foundations of authentic power.

5. Spiritual growth requires the development of inner knowing and inner authority. It requires the heart, not the intellect.

6. What is behind your eyes holds more power than what is in front of them.

7. Awareness is a blissful state, not a painful one.

8. Spiritual Partnership ... The new female and the new male are partners on a journey of spiritual growth. They want to make the journey. Their love and trust keep them together. Their intuition guides them. They consult with each other. They are friends. They laugh a lot. They are equals. That is what a spiritual partnership is: a partnership between equals for the purpose of spiritual growth.

9. The loving personality seeks not to control, but to nurture, not to dominate, but to empower.

10. If you choose to forgive someone who has wronged you rather than to hate that person, you shift the frequency of your Light.

4 things you can do instead of hate Donald Trump

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It’s been a gloomy and crazy two years with President Trump in the office. Now, more than ever, The U.S.A. is very divided. A lot of people are frustrated, annoyed and anxiously awaiting when he will no longer be President.

While this is the reality of many, some people are happy that he is in his position because they believe in his mentality of firmness and that he gets things done.

Whether you agree with him or not, the reality is that he is our President and hating him will not help us progress as a nation. So, instead of hating him, try these FOUR things:

1. Voting

This one is obvious; however, not as obvious as some people may think. I, myself, never really gave voting that much influence until Donald Trump became president. For many years, I had the mentality that someone else would vote for me. However, in a democracy, everyone is responsible for making change happen. In a true democracy, your voice counts towards the end result; it doesn’t always mean that you win but it means that you are heard.

2. Listening to those who voted for someone else.

Although I am an American citizen, I grew up in two other countries so I have a different perspective. I have never lived in a country that is so divided by policies and it frightens me. It makes me ask the question, how can humanity and understanding occur when two sides are at war with each other?

When I speak to a lot of liberals, they look down upon conservatives. And, when I speak to a lot of conservatives, they feel like they aren’t truly allowed to say how they feel. What is the solution? Listening to each other, first. If we speak down upon another, it isolates the other person and the unity is lost. Instead of building a wall of judgement; build a relationship of understanding by listening to why someone decided to vote for him in the first place.

3. Keep your thoughts positive.

I had to stop watching CNN, MSNBC and other news networks because I feel like they focus too much on the downfalls on President Trump. In the laws of physics, what you focus on expands. So, if we continue to hate Trump, he will become stronger. How about we focus on love and positive thoughts? How about we manifest the kind of country that we want? Instead of giving in to hate and negativity. Like Martin Luther King JNR. said, ‘Hate is too great a burden to bear.’ So, let’s elevate our collective consciousness by speaking and thinking words of positivity to get us out of this negative place we are in.

4. Learn why and how this happened.

Trump didn’t come from another planet to ruin ours, like a lot of people paint it. He was born and raised in this country, which means that there are other people like him. These people feel the way he does and are a symptom of the corporate America, where a certain demographic of Americans feel entitled to be better, smarter and more advantaged than others. We need to learn what about The American system has caused this to occur and how we can prevent this. And then find solutions: More money in education? Moving towards other energy resources that can provide people with jobs? Provide accessible healthcare? The past has happened so that we can learn from it, not pretend like it didn’t exist.